Discourage

I wish I could be a kid again, when anything and everything seemed possible.

~Posted From My Black Jack II

MM Tears

I'm so tired but unlike yesterday, I can't sleep. Instead I'm sitting in bed in tears. How did I get to this point? How did I get to the point where I'm working so hard at a job where I'm not appreciated? When I work 12 hours to no avail?

Not once as a child did I ever say I want to grow up and be a low paid, work horse. Yet, here I am. As my co-workers say too me "you're so lucky you get to work overtime" Really? Lucky? Oh, I'm sorry that I'm expected to do whatever it takes to get work done while you hangout on myspace.

It's just one of those days.

~Posted From My Black Jack II

Under My Skin

I went to the evening service tonight at Calvary Chapel South Bay. A part of me wanted to go home as I had just gotten off work, but I knew I needed to go.

It had been a very stressful day. I went to work yesterday as well. At my job systems were failing and work was piling up. On Friday I had lost my badge so I was at the mercy of coworkers to get into the breakroom and such.

Things were moving right along until my 5th hour. Not eating had caught up to me and my anemia was kicking in. Not only was I hungry but I also felt weak. When I get to that point I usually have very little patience for people's garbage. It was at this time that a particular person decided to start sending me horrible text messages. I responded when I knew very well I should have just let her to be nasty.

My response resulted in a slew of more messages. I should have just ignored her, bt I was hungry, weak, angry that I felt obligated to work over the weekend and it was more than I felt I can take. So I fired back and the ensuing messages left me even more drained.

Rushed to church after work, longing for strength to get me through the week, patience to deal with others and overall spiritual uplifting. During the last part of the service, Pastor Steve spoke of Issac and the men who treated him badly then came back acting like "friends." Instead of turning them away, Issac offerred them dinner, and was blessed with working wells as a result.

The pastor ended the service by reminding us not to let others get under our skin. To rise above those who try to tear us down, and to be a blessing to everyone around us. The message resonated with me and I'm thankful that I went to church. It's not easy always trying to be the bigger person, but we must.

I just have to keep praying that I will not allow the negativity, bitterness and antagonization of others draw me into their mire of misery.

~Posted From My Black Jack II

Another Instance

I fall asleep and dream. When I wake I'm confused as to whether I am actually lying in bed or at work.

~Posted From My Black Jack II

Baked Spicy Lobster Roll

Roll #2 for Me

~Posted From My Black Jack II

Still Sick

I was reading some journal entries from a year ago. What's crazy is that I was sick a year ago.

I haven't been writing, which is really bad. Although, I was really inspired yesterday, I dissolved in a fit of coughs.

I really want to get better. I can't afford to keep taking time off.

~Posted From My Black Jack II

Love According to The Cosby Show

"It's loving somebody's weaknesses as well as their strength's...When infatuation wears off that's when real love begins."
--Claire Huxtable

I first heard Claire's explanation of love as a little girl and it stuck with me. Now as an adult I not only understand this statement but to a certain extent, I agree.

~Posted From My Black Jack II

Burger Mission

I'm at the Golden Burger, taking a chance with burgers. This is all thanks to Megan who had a Tweet abt waiting for her dad's burgers. Reading that got me on a craving.

So, I head over to this corner burger place which is located literally a couple of houses away from my apt. It is also the inspiration for a scene in one of my short stories. I have tried several items on the menu and they were not that great. Now I'm trying the item they are named for...

Burger rating: It's ok. I asked for no onion but there were still onions in the burger. Onions make me feel sick and now I don't feel so well.

~Posted From My Black Jack II

Haribo Happy Cola

It started several months ago. I was at WalGreens when I noticed that Haribo Gummi Bears and Happy Colas were on sale for $1 each. As I sat with Ruben we munched on gummies and shared stories about candy.

Another night I felt like gummies and I had run out. So, the next night I was out I ran to the drug store and bought a couple of packages. That night as I waited for Ruben to get out of practice, my best friend Amanda I cracked jokes about gummis.

Since then I started craving Happy Colas as a pick me up. Even now I have just bought another bag instead of cold meds.

This may not be a good thing.

~Posted From My Black Jack II

This Past Week

I think this picture best sums up my life this past week. I haven't been feeling well at all. I have been in the hospital for everything from chest pains to a cold. As for work, I went twice last week.

When it's just me I have a tendency not to eat when I'm sick but my boyfriend pushed me to eat on a more regular basis. (I say more because some days I only ate once a day)

Now it's Sunday and I plan on resting to get well enough for work tomorrow. Waiting for the Chinese food for my sister and me, just so I can take some medicine.

I still have church this evening, but if I'm still coughing really hard then I won't be able to go. Otherwise, they'll have me in the Overflow Room.

I am happy that Blooger is accepting my mobile posts again. Tried going back to Tumblr and Myspace, but mobile blogs there are not the same. They run the entries as one long paragraph.

Back to waiting for Chinese food while I watch the Cosby Show.

~Posted From My Black Jack II

Hopefully...

my mobile Blogger is working again.

~Posted From My Black Jack II